TheWeeklyBrew.com – The Ramblings of a Kitchen Chemist

Hops

C’mon, you didn’t see this one coming?

To hear a beer geek tell it you wouldn’t think there were any other ingredients that contributed to a beers flavor other then hops. Nevermind that alot of European beers get their flavor from the yeast used. Nevermind that for a long time traditional beers used other herbs instead of hops. If it’s made for beer geeks, especially in this region, it will be over hopped. Whether they call themselves hop heads or conesuers they all seem to have a Passion for a flower that resembles a green pine cone.

Hops are a flower from a female vine from the Cannabaceae family, the same family as Marijuana. Hops are the primary bittering agent in beer, and can contribute to the flavor and aroma as well. For a long time American beer drinkers were hop deprived. The primary beers drunk on this continent contained little in the way of bitterness, or hop flavors. The craft beer scene has changed that and now beer geeks have become hop gluttons. This is part of what beer geeks feel separates them from the beer drinking masses, the love of the hop.

Beer geeks aren’t content to quietly enjoy the flower they idolise. They have created festivals to celebrate not only beers that are just souped up hop delivery devices, but also to celebrate the hop in all it’s incarnations. In Oregon alone we have hop festivals for all the cities that are major hop growers. We have festivals to celebrate fresh or wet hops. We also have an IPA festival as well. All of these dedicated to consuming mass amounts overhopped beverages.

Another thing beer geeks enjoy about hops is the smell. If you give a beer geek a hop chances are he will pulverise it by rubbing it between his hands and then sit there sniffing the thing like it’s a drug. They even have people take pictures of them doing this to show off later. But as with any addiction soon the high from sniffing hop cones isn’t enough anymore. Beer geeks at this stage start going on tours of hop fields. Soon after many start growing the vine in their backyards. If the beer geek is edgy enough they will even get a tattoo of a hop cone or a vine in order to show their passion.

Sadly for hop heads the tides seem to be changing for over hopped beers. Still though beer geeks will continue to celebrate this flower.

Unnecessary Adjectives

James Thurbers cartoon sums things up nicely

It’s pretty much a guarantee when you walk into a tap room or swing by beeradvocate that there will be beer geeks fighting over the proper adjectives necessary to describe a beer. To the average person an argument over whether the hops are “catty” or whether the beer being “dark dank and smelling like boot black” is good seem silly. Yet to beer geeks proper use of unnecessary adjectives is a second language that one is required to learn as part of initiation.

The trend of wordy beer descriptions has it’s origins in the wine world. It used to be a sign of class for wine snobs to find creative ways of describing a wine. The more abstract the description, the classier the person. Sadly beer geeks picked up on this trend.

In the early days of craft beer wine was the beverage of choice for refined palates. Beer geeks rightfully felt though that just because they drank a blue collar drink didn’t mean their palates were less refined. In an attempt to market their beverage beer geeks turned to a “like wine” strategy. They showed the world that their beverage went just as well (if not better) with food, offered complex flavors, and lent itself to lengthier prose then it’s grape counterpart.

Beer geeks though had to take their prose to the next level. Both beer and wine have had a set language due to a specific set of characters. Beer geeks though drew from all corners of Websters to reinvent the wheel. Rather then just stating how thick the mouth feel of a beverage was they described it in verse. They began using terms like “catty” and taste descriptions like “boot leather” (good?) and “hop kiss”. To the average Joe reading a beer review it may almost seem like these geeks are just trying to out review each other rather then describe a beer. To us geeks though we are simply speaking the language.

Bill has a great beer review generator here if you want to learn some prose.

from theweeklybrew

Rockstar Brewers

No, I’m not refering to Badass Beer, Kid Rocks attempt at using his name to market a beer using his fame. What I’m refering to is a comment made by Greg Koch that has now spawned the phrase rockstar brewer. At least Gregs keynote speech is the first time I remember hearing it. Ironically Greg himself is one of these self proclaimed rockstars. Kinda funny since Greg is Stone Brewings CEO, and not it’s head brewer. This doesn’t stop him or other rockstars from parading around with all the pomp that the phrase emplies they would have.

To be fair these guys really are rockstars. Instead of shredding a guitar they work in a brewery. Like a rockstar they don’t always write their own music. They just recycle the same old beer styles and recipes from everywhere and put a little of their own spin on it. Occasionally they will colaborate with other rockstars of the brewing world to bestow a mythic brew upon us lowely peasants. One primary difference is instead of being followed by swooning girls who hang on their every world they’re followed by guys with beer guts who act like said girls. They write books, slap their brand on tshirts, and hand out advice as if theirs is the only way. Heck, they even spend most of their free time supporting causes and rallying their fans to stick it to the man, just like real rockstars.

So who are these rockstars? Well there is no be all end all list. Just like a Rolling Stone top 100 list their is always dispute over some of the smaller “indie” artists, and big name headliners who deserve recognition. There is however a basic list of 4 that no one disputes.

• Greg Koch – Stone Brewing Co

• Peter Bouckaert – New Belgium Brewing Company

• Sam Calagione – Dogfish Head Craft Brewery

• Vinnie Cilurzo – Russian River Brewing Company

These 4 are the subject of every beer geeks wet dreams. They covet and hord special releases of their beers. Whenever a new beer is released it skyrockets to the top of the Beeradvocate rating lists without fail. Nevermind that many of these beers released haven’t even seen the minimum aging before the geeks buy them up and suck them down. Nevermind that they never match up to the hype. They are the Gods of beer and we are not worthy.